Thanks Internet. For helping me solve my Premature Ejaculation issues.

I was going through some of my delicious feeds this morning, and came across something that I had not realized had happened. The World Wide Web just turned 20 fucking years old. Which I have to say, left me a little dis-concerted. Why? Well, it makes me old. And also because I can still remember the days of waiting for photo's to materialize on my monitor.
That's right ladies. Blame the tri-dubs for my fascination with bukkake. Not me. If the internet had been faster earlier, I might have had enjoyed tit fucking more. DAMN YOU INTERNET! Hell, I may have turned into an ass man if we had high speed back when I was a kid. Maybe I would have developed a foot fetish? As it stands now I think its gross to lick toejam from girls 3 and forth piggies.
It could have been worse though. Because of the slow speeds of the early internet, I effectively learned how to slow my roll. That's right ladies. This guy. Me. Can now last upwards of 3-4 minutes because I learned how to wait for the entire picture to download.
No need to thank me. Thank Al Gore. That debonare motherfucker helped you get 3 minutes of nirvana.*



*and by Nirvana, I totally mean sweating bullets in that gorilla suit I made you wear.